Always Up for A Good Challenge

A loving friend of mine, Laurel, started sending me these weekly e-mails that a friend of hers, Darby Dugger writes. Each week Darby writes a prayer and an example from her life of an area where she needs Gods love, guidence, and grace within her family. She did a series a while back of 365 prayers for your husband , which I want to buy a copy of. Kevin is such a hard working husband and father. I could never be able to thank him enough for the beautiful life and children he has given me. He takes such pride in everything he does especially when it comes to our children. I have never and will never degrate the way he parents our children. People are different and no two people do things the same. I'm greatful that he does his best even if it means doing it different then I would have done it. I will however, laugh at him when he does humorous thing like dress Addison in 18 month clothes at age 4 but, at least he tries. We as a couple are not perfect but, our relationship has really improved over the years. We are learning how to communicate our needs to one another and how to be the parents God wants us to be. I have really struggled as a Mom. I question myself A LOT but at the end of the day I try to remember God has entrusted us with these beautiful, sweet, smart, perfect little children and it is our job to make sure they learn to love God and do things that would make him proud. Every one of these e-mail touches my heart and hits home but, this one especially made me realize how much we rush through bedtime just so we can selfishly have "our" time to do whatever it is we "need" to do. Our kids will only be small for a short time. I will miss these moments when they are older and have families of their own. I'm going to try especially hard to rise to this challenge and put my selfish needs aside to create a loving bedtime routine in our home, one where our kids go to be feeling loved and safe, knowing that God is there always protecting and loving them. Thanks be to God for my husband who is so very good to me and who is an awesome example of a Father to his children. My only hope is that I can be a loving wife and mother and become the Godly woman I was intended to be. Challenge: What does the "bedtime routine" look like at your house? At our house we brush teeth, change diapers, read a Bible story, act out a Bible story, and then we begin the individual routines: we read a story with Havana, pray with her, and then do a series of kisses and snuggles that are the same every night. Then we go to Jonah's room where we read a story with him, say his prayers, and then do his routine of touching his basketballs and playing with his race cars. Selah goes last and her routine involves lotions/baby massage, prayers, and a bottle. From the time we start the process until the last child is down can take anywhere between 45-60 minutes! I don't know about you, but for me, this can be a very challenging part of the day. It seems that the only time I can get anything accomplished (e-mails, dishes, laundry, phone calls, etc) is after their bedtime and so as the bedtime routine drags out I get impatient knowing that every minute we spend putting the children to bed is one less minute that I have to get things accomplished since my bedtime isn't too much later than theirs. I recently read a Dr. Phil book (don't make fun of me!) and in it he stressed the importance of a routine and his example was the bedtime routine. He talked about the endless benefits having a night time routine has for the children. I certainly was convicted as I read it because I often rush through the routine to get them to bed when I should be relishing in the sweet moments with them and taking my time with them since predictable routines are healthy for children. The Lord didn't stop their in His conviction. I started talking to a friend this week who just returned from a christian parenting conference and she said they talked about how bedtime is the one time of the day that you should never rush. So, clearly, I knew I had to make this week's challenge about developing/keeping a special bedtime routine. If you are like me and your family already has one, then let's make our challenge not to rush it or be disgruntled about it when it takes longer than we expect. If you don't have one- then start one! This doesn't just apply to people with younger kids - I started thinking about what I would want this to look like for us as the children grow into their teenage years and I do picture it as a time for praying together, studying the Word as a family, and then talking with each child about their day and their feelings. So even though the baby massages and race cars won't be around when my kids are older - being an ear and a prayer partner would certainly be a beneficial bedtime routine. If you're children are out of the house - perhaps encourage them to develop a bedtime routine with their little ones. Dear Lord, You created both day and night and as I carry on about my day and as I tuck my children into bed - help me never forget that You are the creator of this world and You have such a purpose for me, my children, and my family. Help me develop a bedtime routine where You are honored and my children feel secure. Help me never to rush past this very important time. Thank You for giving me these precious souls to raise. I love You, Lord. Amen. Prayer: Lord, I pray that my children would be like Zacchaeus as we read about him in the Bible. Just as Zacchaeus climbed a tree to see Jesus in the crowd (Luke 19:3-4), I pray that my children would spiritually and physically do whatever is necessary to see You. May they rise above this culture and climb over sin struggles to fix their eyes on Jesus the author and perfecter of their faith (Hebrews 12:2). May my children know that You will acknowledge them personally (Luke 19:5) and that no matter the sin in their life or the mistakes they have made; You desire a relationship with them just as you did with "the sinner" Zacchaeus (Luke 19:7). And, following his example, I pray that my children will open up their hearts to You just as he opened up his home to You (Luke 19:5-6). Zacchaeus declared before everyone that he was changing his ways and turning from his sin "here and now" and I pray that my children would do that as well - "here and now" - may nothing keep them from making behavioral changes after You have called them to repentance (Luke 19:8). Lord, You came to seek and save the lost (Luke 19:10) and I pray my children come to personalize that verse and know that You came to seek and save them. May the awesome truth of Your pursuit of them coupled with Your unconditional love and forgiveness bring them to their knees. I pray my children will live their life time glorifying You in every relationship, every deed, and with every breath. I ask all of these things in the powerful name of Jesus. Amen.

I'm feeling guilty

So this is probably the longest stint that I have gone with no post. Heck, I didn't even finish my last post. I have no excuses other then I have been busy. Busy being a mom to two children that require most if not all of my attention. I guess I feel most guilty about not blogging about Mason. I want him to have memories of things he was doing and for him to know how important he was too. One thing that I have definitely learned since becoming a mother is that ~ my life is not my own. You learn the true meaning of being selfless when you have children, which I'm not complaining about, I love my kids and I value them both so much. It is through them that I know who I am and what I was meant to do. I have my days~ Man! Do I have my days. Days where I want to bury my face in a pillow and scream as loud as I can but, there is noting in this world I would trade my life for. Sometimes I just have to laugh to keep from crying. I seriously feel like there is a camera hidden in my house filming the crazy stuff that goes on each and every day and the audience is laughing at me . For instance.... for almost two weeks straight Mason had horrible blow outs. One time there was no poop in his actual diaper but it was in a pile on the floor, Really? How does that even happen? The same week Mason was experiencing vomiting. I had never been around a puking baby this was new to me. Seriously it was like the exorcist took over his body and a puke foutine erupted. Craziest thing I had ever seen. Another puke experience was Mason would not go to sleep and I had reached my limit and went in for one final paci replacement and saw two separate piles of puke. One was all baby food the other formula and there is Mason laying in the middle of both covered in puke. So he got a bath for the third time that day. I have story after story like these. But it is motherhood. No one said it was going to be easy in fact I'm pretty sure everyone said it was the hardest job you will ever have. Buried in these extremely hard moments are the sweetest moments that just fill me with the most indescribable joy I have ever known. Like when Addison tells me I'm the best mommy to ever come from Heaven or when Mason kisses me on the lips. Having one kid has it perks. Addison and I went so many places and I was free to be more creative and a more hands on Mom. With the birth of Mason (whom I love very much and feel so blessed to have) there is a major difference in Addison. Him being born really rocked her world. She loves him and is very good to him , most of the time but, she has expressed that since he requires more attention, that I love him more. It breaks my heart to hear that. I try to reassure her frequently of my love and how very special she is to me. For three and a half years she was it for us. She was the center of Kevin and my world. All of our love and attention was solely give to Addison and now that time and love is shared between she and Mason. I can see where that would be hard to understand. I can see the benefit in having kids closer together but also not. I never wanted Addison to feel cheated like she was robbed of her time with just us but then again Mason never had just that time. The only me and Mason time I had was in the hospital and now the couple of hours a week I get when Addison is in school most of which he sleeps. I guess having two you can never truly be fair and you almost always feel like you there aren't enough hours in the day and you try to spread yourself too thin. Pretty sure these are all normal feeling for Moms.
Here I sit writing this thinking back over the last four and a half years watching Addison grow into a four year old and Mason an eleven months old little boy. Addison and Mason could not be more different. Addison was such a wonderful sweet little baby. I loved dressing her up. She has always been my sunny funny girl. She loves to be silly and I have never met someone who likes to shake her little booty so much. She has really become such a girlie girl. She thinks every outfit requires a tutu and makeup. She already has a boyfriend and she is just SO in love with Bishop but wants to marry Mason when she grows up. She is so very smart. The questions she asks me and the understanding of things she has, is crazy. I sometimes forget she is four. She has a memory like no other. I love that everyday when I pick her up she asks about my day. I love how compassionate she is when I get hurt. I love how very much she loves her Daddy and Grammy. I love when she tells Mason he is adorable and the best brother ever. I like it when she tells him he can do things like she does when he is bigger. She is a wonderful daughter. She gives me a run for my money but I love her so much.
Mason, oh Mason. He is my big blue eyes boy. He is my little booger boy. He is so easy to make laugh and smile. He loves to be included in Addison and Daddy's rough housing. He is very curious. He has absolutely no fear of anything. Hence the reason he hits his head at least three times a day, he fell in the tub head first (no water in there thank God) ate dog food, unrolled a roll of toilet paper , puts someones shoe in his mouth at least every day, had chewed on both a pad and tampon (neither used thank God again) almost successfully gotten the toilet bowl brush in his mouth three times. He gets his feeling hurt easy. He doesn't like being told "no" and will throw himself on the floor in a fit if you tell him no. He is so calm too. I can put him in the grocery cart and he will sit there quietly looking around for a very long time. He loves to eat and now requires a taste of whatever someone else has. He is always on the go trying to see how things work and what he can get in his mouth. He is way more oral the Addison ever was. He still at eleven months has yet to say Momma. When we enter Addison's room he starts saying "issy". He always wants to do whatever Addison is doing. He thinks she is so funny and loves it when she includes him in whatever she is doing.
I love my kids. I love that I have this opportunity. I do struggle A LOT with being a Mom. I'm far from perfect. I get tired and burnt out but, no job I have ever had, fills my soul like being a Mom. Not every day is rainbows and sunshine and home cooked meals and a spotless house, actually most days are quite the opposite of that. I think what I have learned is when you can look at all the crazy moments and say it is SO worth it just to have these two little people, that is unconditional love. My kids are great and I love them to pieces and I thank God for making me their Mom. I will never take them for granted. And if my blog isn't always updated its because I'm busy being a Mom.